Definition of a eating disorder:Eating disorders are a group of serious conditions in which you're so preoccupied with food and weight that you can often focus on little else. The main types of eating disorders are anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa and binge-eating disorder.
- characterized by serious disturbances of eating behavior
Look HERE to see the symptoms of the most typical eating disorders.
Definition of Fitness
1. The state or condition of being fit; suitability or appropriateness.
2. Good health or physical condition, especially as the result of exercise and proper nutrition.
3. Biology The extent to which an organism is adapted to or able to produce offspring in a particular environment.
okey, lets look at definition two:
2. Good health or physical condition, especially as the result of exercise and proper nutrition.
This is the type of fitness I'm thinking about (even all of the definitions are relevant). And the key words are exercise and proper nutrition.
If you are a fitness freak (like me) this two words stays in you head 24-7.
We are using exercise and food to achieve different goals within our sport - as you know, my focus is mostly about strength training; first developing muscles, and then getting a fat percentage that shows what you have developed (is the plan now).
The stronges counterparts are what we call Bulking (creating a bigger volume) and Ripping/cutting (getting rid of body fat).
I have always had a big focus on training,been a really active person since I was born. I've been through many many sports, and all my education have been circling around the human body(itself and its function) its ability to perform sports, and ability to adapt to external stimuli (like exercise).
Let me take you through my first journey of getting ripped.
Why? Well, I have always had a inner dream to stand on the stage, winning some sort of fitness/bodybuilder class.
So last spring/summer I decided to see how my body would react, and just see how it looked with a lower fat percentage.
To get the perfect summer body. To feel well and proud walking around on the beach!
Feelings and thoughts during the ripping:
- I loved to see the fat disappear
- I loved to see how muscles where more visible
- I was speechless too see how you actually could manipulate how your body look with some adjustments in exercise and diet
- My favorite jeans fitted again
- I liked to show of what I had worked for
BUT! there was also some less positive thoughts and meanings around it as well
- I started comparing myself to others all the time
- I though it was 100% okey to give the body less food than what it needed.
- My focus on how the body looked got enormous (more than whats healthy as I see it now)
- I bought clothes in a smaller size to see if I could get into them
- Got self centered
- I cared more and more about what people where saying about me.
Well - this type of dieting is actually a kind of controlled form of anorexia, and they say that many people having a sort of eating disorder does it because they want a feeling of control.
Maybe actually this was the case in my situation too? when I look back on it, I see that some of my thoughts could be worrying - if you set it in a perspective to a eating disorder.
Need control!
At the time I started dieting, I was in a early stage of my grief process after the loss of my dad.
Grief is a really hard emotion to handle - or its a mixture of emotions you really cant handle. You just have to go through it.
The training and the dieting became a way for me to handle this emotions.
By pushing my mind and body close to the limit all the time, I created an illusion to myself that if I can do this, I can handle everything!
You maybe heard about the "good girl syndrome" - and there you got me in a nutshell!
I stuck to the school and my training regimen, to always have something to put my thoughts at, pushing the feelings away.
I wanted to be best in everything!
- Be strong
- Look good
- Good at school
Yes, I wanted to be superwoman.
And yes, this where the things I stuck to in order to cope with everyday life.
Result:
A nice lean body, and NO motivation and joy around training anymore.
All the focus in the training got centered about the fact that i wanted to "look good".
And NON of my problems disappeared. Of course my old jeans fitted well, but emotionally I where still the same.
So! If you want to get ripped, I hope you consider the risks that actually exists around it. And that you are doing it for the right reasons.
Your body does not reflect your self esteem!! It's important to cope with the feelings you have in a proper way, and let the esthetics of your body belong to another category of motivation.
And NOW, Let me take you through my journey in bulking!
The summer was over, and now I decided to start bulking. I wanted some more muscles on my body.
- I got bigger, really fast (more than I ever weighted)
- I felt extremely big (and not in a good way)
- My clothes didn't fit anymore
- I covered my body
- I felt fat and ugly (feel sorry for my boyfriend hearing this sentence over and over again!)
- People started talking about me
" She is much bigger now "
" Why didn't she just maintain what she have obtained?"
" I heard she gained 15Kg's"
- My self esteem hit the bottom
BUT I did not stop eating more than what my body needed.
and slowly but surely my thoughts changed ( it took only 8 long months!)
- Now I feel I look good
- I have a feeling of control
- I like what I see when I look in the mirror (but still i have some problems looking at pictures taken now and then)
- I enjoy the excess energy on training
- I enjoy being stronger
- my focus in training is where it's supposed to be, and where it always was before this little dark period of mine.
I still miss my dad, but I got the joy about training back, and I've started to look forward to do things I enjoy.
You can say it like I got back the joy in my life :)
And, as you know - now I will start on a new period of ripping
This time more prepared physically and mentally.
My goal this time is to be able to do a competition this fall.
But I have to pay close attention to my feeling and thoughts. If my thoughts get worrisome again, then I'm simply not mentally ready to stand on a stage where you are being judged by appearance.
This sport is not just about exercises and dieting, but it's a mental test.
I feel ready! So I hope I am! :)
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/eating-disorders/DS00294
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